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Remember when I posted this blog? and I said we'll see? Well... things turned out, and have still been going quite well. I've been spending much time with this Wrangler and boot wearin, lifted truck drivin, water skiing boy and i'm quite fond of him to say the least.

I'm a very happy girl, and I could say way too much on this topic (I write much more in an actual journal, imagine that).. but he makes me very happy. That is all. = ]]

growing up?... kinda?

today was a lazy day for work. (clearly. hair up.. yoga pants, done.) but i was surprisingly in a much better mood than yesterday. work was very slow, worked mostly on projects and at the registers, than i came home and got ready to go grocery shopping and cook dinner...

i came home and started working on dinner and waited for Thomas to come over. when he got there, i had made the two of us a crown and coke (yumm) and was about to put the quiche in the oven.... so we stood in the kitchen, drinking our drinks while i finished up dinner while he told me about how his day in the office had been................ grown ups?.. so weird. (but i like it).
(dinner was very yummy, thanks for the fresh asparagus Thomas!)

Half-Christmas!

Today was "Half-Christmas".. June 25th, 6 months until Christmas! We had my grandparents over for dinner to celebrate my Grandpa's 73rd birthday and a late father's day! We had some yummy italian food from Gino's for dinner, than my "half-Christmas" festivities started...

I decided that I HAD to watch "Elf" (one of my FAVORITE Christmas movies) and drink some hot chocolate! ( Cam, and my parents ended up watching the movie too = ] )
..and I decided to make some snickerdoodles! (Thomas really likes them and him and his family are coming over for dinner tomorrow so I figured I could send some home with him).

Finished product!!

It's been a looonnnnnggg day.. worked from 8:30-2, came home, helped around the house than had my "half-Christmas" festivities and I am TIRED! Tomorrow is going to be quite eventful as well! Church in the morning, seeing "Little Shop of Horrors" again! (this time with my mom), than the parents (mine and Thomas') will be meeting for the first time at a bbq at my house with both of our families! I'm excited, it should be eventful, but I need much sleep before that, so goodnight!! = ]]

this time it will be different.

it's time to grow up. to start treating my life and living my life the way an adult would. don't get me wrong, i'm not going to lose my "ballgown wearing, swaying to the music, free spirited" persona, i'm just going to start being more responsible. i also want to start exploring and expressing more of all of the layers of my personality that i'm beginning to discover that i have. it's hard to explain i guess, but in the fall when i go back to school, i want things to be different. i want to explore what it's like to live on my own, but not treat it as though i'm at a semester long summer camp where i kinda let things get out of hand. i want to create a routine for myself. waking up at the same time everyday, regardless of when my class starts that day.. i want to get up and eat breakfast everymorning (it's the most important meal of the day, and for me, also the most skipped). i want to go to my classes, come home, have a legit time in everyday where i sit down at the table and do. my. homework., than i want to cook myself (and maegan) dinner. i want to have a dinner time! when i'm at home, everyday around the same time we sit down and eat, when i'm at school this doesn't usually happen and my eating schedule is all messed up.. and than i want to hang out for a little, read or watch a movie, or whatever, than go to bed. routine.

i also want to start really surrounding myself with the things that make me happy, make me feel good about what i'm doing with my life and who i am. i know it sounds silly and like such a small thing, but i want to have REAL plants in my apartment, ones that grow, ones that i water, and ones that, depending on what they are, smell good! i want to have more candles everywhere! i want to put more pictures up on the walls and have colorful pictures or artwork of somekind surrounding me.. it makes me feel good and i think it's actually good for your soul.

i want to recycle! i want to be resourceful! i want to use less "one time use" things, like zip lock bags, paper towels and plastic bottles... and when i do use plastic, i want to recycle it! i want to start eating, cooking and living much healthier! when i do this, i always feel so much better, my body and my energy! i want to keep my (and maegan's) space clean and pretty! i don't want to make excuses for having messes everywhere and dishes in the sink when people come over because there aren't excuses.

it's time to grow up... but not lose "me".. just enhance it in a different way. i'm looking forward to this, i think it's going to be a good thing.

creativity is to rid yourself of all uncertainties.

me: complex. hippie, flowerchild, loud, exaggerated. music. country, beatles, elvis, beirut. performer. theater, ballet, song and dance. theater. comedy, drama, feeling, expression. life: decorate. interiors and exteriors. thrift stores. memories, antiques, treasures. molding and changing. inside and out. feelings. of your own, of others, of observation, of heart. love. others, yourself. dreams. attainable, believable, realistic, future. expression. clothes, thoughts, music, dance, laughter, stories, vulnerability. photography. seeing life through an others lens, another perspective, someone elses.

i don't really know what this post means. these words are thoughts, lists of expression. sometimes i feel as though i harbor creativity that i hold inside for fear of appearing conventional or otherwise. through theater and dance i have been able to express many emotions but there is so much more. inside every show, every piece, there is so much being said, so much to learn and so much to discover. the same goes for every piece of dance, music, photography or person you ever encounter. there are new things to discover and learn everywhere you go. stories to hear and stories to be told. i want to open up and let my creativity run wild. i have so much to say and learn and express. where will i start? how will i learn to let it be expressed? i want to sway with the wind and jump head first into the adventure of life, for it has only just begun.

"the more you know, the more you see."

-aldous huxley

Happy Father's Day!!

I LOVE MY DAD!!!

He's one of the hardest workers I know and has always been such an amazing provider for my family and still has "time" to coach all my brother's baseball teams, and go to all their games and take us on vacations and the list goes on! He's the best.

Benefit Dinner!

This has been a crazy week to say the least friends.

I've been working almost everyday and they 2 that I didn't were due to catching a bit of the flu bug that has evidentally been making it's way around Victoria's Secret. (Yeah for co-workers who share! haha) So now i'm finally having a second to breath, I have the rest of the night off (going to see "Little Shop of Horrors" with my good friend Camila) and have all day tomorrow off for church and Father's day festivities.

So here's what I did on Thursday night!

I went to a benefit/fundraiser with Thomas at the Rodeo grounds in Salinas. It was for an up and coming non-profit called the "Helping Hands Foundation of Monterey County." They raise money for locals who need a little help hear and there with medial needs. (ie: needing a wheelchair and cant pay for it, doing repairs for local rehab centers, helping to pay for some medicines, etc.) It was a really cool thing to help support actually! I didn't even know it exsisted until that night!

Prior to the event, and I mean JUST prior, like a few hours before, I got my first EVER pair of cowboy boots to wear to the event! These are REAL cowboy boots, not Target or Macys immitation boots, these were purchased at boot barn! They are beautiful and comfy and I love them! Anyway, back to the event.

There was an open bar, so yes.. a drink or two was consumed, but we were dropped-off and picked-up, and we had some delicious bbq! We had steak (suuuppppperrrr yummy), beans, salad and bread! It was quite delicious.

This was a very cute little home town event at which I felt very grown up. We, with the exception of about 4 of Thomas' friends, were the youngest people there by about 10 years at least. There were silent and live auction items, Thomas bid on one for a gift certificate to go golfing, which he got (which again made me feel OLD), and raffles that went on during the night. There were also 3 cute old men playing country music all night. But they were splitting into some pretty impressive 3-part harmonies that I quite enjoyed! = ]

red.

a day off? what to do, what to do. i slept in. had some breakfast, had some delicious coffee in my "luke's" cup (if you're a "Gilmore Girls" fan, you'll know why this is so cool!), watched "Harry Potter" with Cam, and painted my nails red. Having pretty red nails always makes me feel so classic and feminine. Now i'm off to get ready to run some arrands, go to Boot Barn to buy my first pair of boots, than come home and get ready for a "surprise" dinner with the boy. He wont tell me where it is or what we're doing, i've just been told to wear my boots. I'm excited!

Happy Thursday!

Lake Trip #2

This last weekend was lake trip #2 of the summer! I was able to take the weekend off, after a long week of working and got to have a relaxing trip at the lake with the boy and his family. Tiffany, Thomas' sister, and I were able to tube a little, with Thomas as our driver which was a little scary.. but super fun. I got to see Thomas ski a bunch and I got to ski for the first time! I got up on my first try and everyone was pretty impressed, apparently they thought I was going to whipe out a bunch and I didn't. Here are some pictures from our weekend!

This was my view out the window of Thomas' truck on the way there! We listened to country music basically the whole way there, it was the best!

When we decided to make a stop at the John Deere store only to find out it was closed, Thomas got to talking to some guys that worked there.. and this picture was the result of his sister and I having to wait for him in the truck. (Yes, I know.. I put his hat on backwards).

This is Thomas' new wakeboard. The "Team Thomas" sticker was also a new addition. "Team Thomas" started off as a joke but is now in the process of becoming a real thing.. I'll tell you all more about that when there is more to tell. = ]

These next two pictures pretty much sum up our relationship...

I love it.

It was quite a fun weekend. Then we got back home and had to get back to work, and now i've fallen slightly ill.. and yesterday was my brotherS birthdays! Casey is now 20 and Cameron is now 13!!! Crazzzyy!!! Time for more rest, and a baseball game and birthday dinner tonight!! = ]

Gotta love Metaphors!

Tori and Dean are a reality tv couple that I shamelessly follow on Oxygen. Tori Spelling was the actress from 90210 and Dean McDermott is her husband who is a tv actor. They have a reality show call "Tori and Dean: Home Sweet Hollywood" that was about their family that I LOVE and now they have a new show called "Tori and Dean: sTORIbook Weddings." Long story short, I really like them.

Now. Tori is a hilarious lady. She is very eccentric, she tends to worry A LOT, she double (or triple) books herself and spreads herself super thin (no reference to her weight), she has all kinds of silly irrational fears, can be super sensitive and can be, well... a pain in the ass! But in spite of all of this, Dean loves her to pieces, thinks she's super hot, an amazing mom/wife and the greatest thing since sliced bread. Dean is also super masculine, and loves his toys (in his case, motorcycles).
Because of this, I have began to refer to the relationship between Thomas and I by saying "He's the Dean to my Tori." Because, well.... I can see the similarities!

While talking to Thomas tonight on the phone, I attempted to explain this reference to him because of course he has NO idea what the relationship between Tori and Dean is like in the slightest (let alone who they are). So he came up with his own reference to our relationship by responding "so.. it's like you being the Yamaha to my track!" Which doesn't mean too much to me, but i'm pretty sure we are saying the same thing in our own ways.

I love it!

a "mellow" Friday night.

Tonight after I got off of my 1-5 shift at Victoria's Secret I made my way over to a good friend of the families house to babysit for the night! I have known this couple since they were just married, and i've known their kids since they were still in their momma's belly! They are now 9 and 7 and I have been babysitting them for years.

When I arrived I was told we would be having mac & cheese for dinner, which I'm totally fine with, and I was served water in a glass that made me so happy! In recent years I have fallen in love with the idea of using old jars as glasses, so when I saw we would be drinking our water out of these jars, I was very happy!


After dinner I painted my nails this pretty purple, with the supervision of Boston (the 9 year-old).

While my hands were drying Boston asked if she could add some detail to my already painted toes, so I said, sure why not.. she she added "zebra" stripes to my toes.

Finished product!

While all of this was going on we watched "High School Musical 3"! I was very excited about this decision.. although we didn't get to finish it, the dvd was a little scratched.

And just now, mid blog, (i took a break), I got a massage from Lucas (the 7 year-old)! He offered to demonstrate (for FREE) his mad massaging skills! I told him that he should do this professionally in a spa and he said when he was older he'll "give it a shot." Too cute.

I'll probably be here pretty late (i'll probably crash on the couch before their parents get back), then in the morning at around 7am i'm heading to the lake with the boy and his family for the weekend. (a much needed relaxing time after a verrry long week). = ]

The Orange and Black!

On Tuesday night, after we both got off work, Thomas and I (along with his friend Ross and his girlfriend Luca) drove up to San Fransisco to see our lovely Giants play the Washington Nationals.

We sat in bleacher seats, which I've done a time or two before. The tickets for those seats are fairly inexpensive and you still get a great view of the game! Granted, it was freezing, but it was still a very good time!

And of course Thomas and I had to share some delicous, and very strong, AT&T ball park garlic fries!

It was a very fun, but very late night! We didn't get back into Salinas until around 1:30am and I had to work the next morning at 7am in Monterey, and Thomas had to go in around 5:30am in Salinas. Let's just say we were very tired the next day.

Goes along with growing up

Right now I feel a little bit like this picture. Like i'm standing there watching my life in front of me and it's in a little bit of a blur. (Or at least that's how it looks inside my head).

Most of what's going on in my life makes a lot of sense.. I'm home for the summer, working two jobs, hanging out with the boy and friends in my free time, etc. What is a blur is the war that is constantly being fought inside my head in regards to growing up, fighting (and working) towards my independence and battling with the fact that based on my income level and that I still have a year left of school... being completley independent isn't exactly an option.

My whole life I've been a very stubborn girl. One who wants to play by all her own rules, do whatever she wants whenever she wants, and if someone tells me to do something that I don't want to do.. chances are, if I can get away with it, I wont do it. Now i'm not saying that this is a good thing at all, it is actually something that I very much need to work on, and as I get older, compromise is proving itself to be something that I need to work on more and more.

And here's the other issue.. my free spririt. The free spirit inside me that wants to just roll with the punches, live in the moment and have a very No Day But Today attitude, has kinda been getting my in trouble in terms of the responsibility that I need to be recognizing as I'm growing into an adult.

This last semester I kind of screwed up a little in 2 major ways, with school and with parking/car issues. About a week after the add/drop period had ended was also about the exact time that I decided I was going to be changing my major in the fall. It was a little bit of a process figuring out what exactly I was going to change it to but it ended up working out for me to now be a Liberal Studies major with a minor in both Theatre and Creative Writing. Anyway, being that this was the new plan for school in the fall, I completley checked out in all of my classes I was enrolled in for the semester because I now knew that, with the exception of my GPA, I didn't need these classes to graduate. Long story short, I got awful grades and have decided to take it upon myself to pay for my schooling now because I don't think it's fair for them to be paying for it, based on how I did this last semester... The other issue, was with parking/car stuff. Now when I first moved into my apartment I was given the option to pay for another parking spot for, I think it was, $20 extra bucks a month.. or something like that, and I didn't want to take the time (or pay the money) to do it, so I just figured I would park on the street and it wouldn't be a big deal. Let me tell you, now I am wiiiishhhhing that I would have gotten that second parking spot because now, for various reasons that I don't really wish to explaing I owe my parents money for mayyybe 10 or so parking tickets....

Long story short, I am wanting to be a completley independent woman who doesn't have to rely on her parents, but instead I am going to have to be spending my summer paying them back, and figuring out how to pay for school... this is probably one of the first times in my life that I wish I was more grown up....

Another random thought..

While driving around in Spreckles the other day with Gail and Nat, we stumbled upon this house! Now you see, Spreckles has lots of adorable little houses similar to this one, but for whatever reason, this one caught my eye. I would love one day to have a house similar to this one. One with just enough rooms for everyone in my family, with a white kitchen,
a family room, and maybe and office or a game room. More so than those physical accommodations, I want it to be filled with a loving husband, beautiful children, a puppy (or two), the joy and love of God, and lots of extended family and friends that are always around and welcome to fill our home and lives with happiness. One day I will have these things, but until then, I like to just daydream about the time that I will.

Country Music is SO Smart!

"Baby why you wanna cry? You really oughta know that I just have to walk away sometimes. We're gonna do what lovers do, we're gonna have a fight or two, but I aint ever changin my mind! Crazy girl, don't you know that I love you? And I wouldn't dream of going nowhere! Silly woman, come here, let me hold you. Have I told you lately? I love you like crazy, girl. Wouldn't miss a single day, I'd probably just fade away, without you I'd lose my mind. Before you ever came along, I was livin life all wrong, smartest thing I ever did was make you all mine..."

When I'm sitting there crying and being a huge pain in the ass.. these lyrics are his words in a song. = ]

Summer.... so far!

(my room...)
(my boarding passes... i was only supposed to have 4)

(Thomas and I at the lake... after flying from off the tube 22 times)

Moved home (very quickly).

Went to the lake.

Unpacked and re-packed to go to CO.

Spent the night alone in Dallas.

Had a blast in CO, once I finally got there.

Lots of time with the boy.

Got a surprise visit from Gail and Nat back here in Monterey.

Worked on getting my room (and my life) under control.

Got both jobs squared away.

and.. Started working.

It's been good so far...
but for some reason I've been super tired!

Thank goodness it's summer and I can catch up on some rest!