that cliche "another chapter coming to an end" feeling...

(Pictures in no particular order). I can't believe that this time in my life is actually coming to an end and happening all at the same time... I can't believe my college experience is ending and that I will be moving forward into the real world... I don't think I ever thought this time would actually happen. It's a really strange feeling. 

 The experiences I've had and the friends I've made, I wouldn't trade for anything. I love that for this last year we have lived only two doors down from our good friends Keifer and Kinkaid. (below is Keifer and I, we love each other). 

 Tonight I have to write my farewell letter to the chapter and I have no idea what I'm going to say or where I would even start. This has been a huge part of my college experience since I moved down to Northridge. I honestly don't know what I would have done if I hadn't rushed... I wouldn't have met Maegan, or my littles Amanda and Justine, or any of my other amazing sisters and all the awesome guys I've met through the Greek System. I honestly cannot image my time here without them. 

 Gail has been a another huge part of my life here. She is a sorority sister, a fellow theatre "major" (except she actually is a major), and an amazing friend. 

 (Maegan and I circa Spring 2011) 

 (Me and my "Alpha" Littles, Amanda and Melissa circa Fall 2010)

 (This is the first picture Maegan and I ever took together, I cannot even believe how different we look, it's insane... this feels like it was 5 years ago, and only 2 months ago all at once... man time flies)

When I first moved here to go to school I never in a million years would have thought that I would end up falling in love with it. That entire first year living in the dorms was torture. The second semester was better after I got dumped and decided to rush. Than the next fall living in the DZ house with Maegan was where college really felt like it started. 

Which is why sometimes I feel a little cheated of my time here... because I only really had 2 real years of what really felt like what college was supposed to feel like. I also haven't been in a show in all my time here. The parts just haven't been 100% right for me, I've auditioned and gotten called back but the part has gone to the better suited girl, and that's okay! That's what happens in theatre, so I understand, it just would have been nice, and I've been itching to get back on stage. It's been a really long 2 years since "RENT." (This is also why I have taken it upon myself to be in as many in-class scenes as I possibly can via the directing class, because I need to be acting). 

I already feel like this song from "Avenue Q," "I wish I could go back to college," and I haven't even graduated. I just want to make this last few weeks stretch on longer... I do not want my directing class to be over, I love being with those people and our professor and just watching and working through scene after scene and talking about them and acting in as many as I have, and learning as much as I have, this class has been by far one of my favorite classes I've ever taken at CSUN. 

I'm not ready to be done.

expectations.

Dancing has always been something that has really struck a chord with me.

Since dance has been a part of my life since I was 3-years-old, and since I've been able to utilize my history of ballet to grow my passion for musical theatre, dance is something that really resonates with me. (No but really, I swear, sometimes I can actually feel it vibrate through my body). 

Because of this, contemporary dance and lyrical hip-hop pieces have had the chance to move me to tears multiple times via "So You Think You Can Dance..." and because of this I have developed a heart for these dance styles.

With that being said,

the video above is of a "flash mob" style marriage proposal that was done at Downtown Disney,

and I don't know what it is, but the song, "Marry You" by Bruno Mars, paired with the dance moves and the overall emotion of this video make me so incredibly happy. I love this so much. 

last DZ formal

My last DZ formal was last weekend. 

It was a blast. 

Maegan and I got all dressed up together, drank together and danced together.

I can't believe my time with DZ is almost over, and that it even went by this fast!

 I have my 2 amazing littles; Amanda and Justine. (this is Justine.)

 At my first formal, as a new member, I was voted "DZ to be."

 and I went with my friend Dustin.

 This year I took my friend Jared. 

Do you think I look different almost 3 years later?

More on DZ later. (the end is nearing).

Hope you all had a good weekend!

food for thought...

I don't really know how to talk about this and have it be cohesive, so just know this is kind of just my stream of consciousness... 

The song in the clip I added above is a song from "Titanic." For me when I hear this song, most (if not all) of the overwhelming emotions this movie makes me experience come rushing back... just from hearing it... 

This song is absolutely gorgeous, as is the movie... but I what I found interesting was that the title of this song is "Never an Absolution." Now the definition for "absolution" is the one I have showing below... based on it's meaning, it gave me an interesting feeling toward the title of the song. It made me think about how unforgiving this tragedy was, and how the title is meant to be saying "Never a freeing from guilt or blame"... and this is basically one of the title songs of this movie... I just thought it gave an interesting meaning to it... what do you think?

ab·so·lu·tion

   [ab-suh-loo-shuhn]  Show IPA

noun

1.

act of absolving; a freeing from blame or guilt; release fromconsequences, obligations, or penalties.

2.

state of being absolved.

Today will be a good day, because I say so! -Michael Murray

Today I was so so happy with the other students in my classes. I brought this little can into class, made a little speech about what it was for, then passed it around, and almost every person in both of my classes donated! I was so happy! Such a good thing. 

With Courage We Conquer

Hey Everyone! I know I haven't been writing that much but that's just how busy I've been. This semester has been beautiful and amazing and changing and insane. (With no signs of slowing down). This Saturday is Relay For Life on campus and my roommate Maegan is captaining a team. We, along with our sorority Delta Zeta, are going to be supporting this event and trying to raise as much money for it as we can. So please, please, take a moment to think about what your money would be going toward; cancer. Cancer effects all of us, whether it's a family member, a friend or a relative of a friend, it's there. We all need to remember this, remember the ones we've lost and hope and fight for those who are still fighting. Please, if you can, click on this link to donate. Type in either "DZ Fights Back" under Team Name, or "Maegan Murray" for a participant. Every dollar counts! 

untitled.

Ok. I don't want to say too much on this topic, being that I've beaten it to death, but lately I've been toying with the regret of the last 3 years. I have been in school, wrestling with the idea(s) of what I want to do with my life... all the while having the constant of my love for theatre. I was an undecided major, than a Journalism major, then I eventually switched over to Liberal Studies and added the minor of Creative Writing to the Theatre minor I already had in progress. With every theatre class I have taken in college... the more my passion for this medium has exploded. Long story short, I wish more than anything I could have been a theatre major, and me not knowing what I wanted to do with my life, is the only thing I can blame for the reason I'm not... but it's been hurting a bit lately. All I know is, I can't go back a change the last 3 years, but I can move forward from here. I am absolutely in love with theatre and will do whatever I can to incorporate this love and this art into as many corners of my life as I can from here on out.